No, my quest for sanity did not end when Annie was born. If anything, it BEGAN. I'm going to give a quick summary of the last 3 crazy months. While I was on bed rest, Dan started house hunting. I don't know...something about having 3 kids in an apartment didn't really appeal to him. We were all getting claustrophobic, I guess, and so we made a deal that if we bought a house within 6 months of me having the baby, all I had to was show up and sign papers. Dan looked at the house while I was still in the hospital after having Annie, and he took pictures of it to show me in my hospital bed. We made an offer that night without me laying eyes on it. Yes, I am a freaking BRAVE (INSANE) woman!! As it turns out, it IS the perfect house, and I couldn't be happier.
About a week after I had Annie, I found out my paid maternity leave had run out. Since we were going to be buying a house, I kinda needed that... My boss was amazing. He not only created a new position for me to let me pick my own hours, but he INSISTED I bring Annie with me. "A baby's place is with their Mama! I want to see her here every day!" Talk about BLESSINGS!!!
So, I get a new baby, a new house, and went back to work. I laughed at my doctor when he asked me if I had made any major life changes recently, as they could put me at an even higher risk for postpartum depression since I'd had it before. I told him I just didn't have time for it this time around, and that is exactly how it stayed. I have never felt better after having a baby. I think that having so much to do and yet having Annie with me actually helped me avoid it.
After we moved into the house, I started getting a strong feeling I needed to quit my job, even though they were being more than amazing with my schedule and my Annie Arrangement. Summer was coming, she was getting bigger, and we would probably have to put all 3 kids in day care. My paycheck would pretty much just cover day care at that point. This decision was more than a financial one, though. I've ALWAYS wanted to be a Stay At Home Mom and raise my kids. The only reason I was working was because Dan was finishing school and looking for work. I didn't HAVE to work anymore. So, here I am. I am a Stay At Home Mom of 3 kids. I couldn't be happier!!
Saturday, June 2, 2012
Monday, March 5, 2012
3/2/2012
Annie Mae decided to grace us with her presence on Friday, March 2, 2012 at 6:28 am. She weighed 7 lbs, 5 oz and was 18 inches long. She is ADORABLE! And the kids absolutely love her. All of everything was 200% worth it. This little girl has all 4 of us wrapped around her littlest finger, and no one is complaining.
Thursday I was having contractions. Nothing new there. Dan and I had decided that we weren't going to go into the hospital for contractions anymore, seeing as we just kept getting sent home. We came up with a list of 3 reasons we'd go to the hospital: My water breaking, signs of distress (preeclampsia, bleeding, and so on), and my scheduled induction time. Well, I was fairly active Thursday. I danced while I cleaned, went grocery shopping, and even decided to walk to Jayden's school to pick him up instead of drive. It was a good day. Until about 4:30 pm when I noticed that my pants were wet. Not just a little wet, but "Um, I don't remember peeing my pants..." wet. I called Dan several times, but he was in a meeting at work. I tried calling my mom, too, but she was also in a meeting. I was FREAKING OUT. I finally got a hold of both of them, coordinated getting kids dropped off, and sat down to wait. Dan wasn't at all in a hurry, which, to be honest, was kind of ticking me off. I mean, I know we've had labor stopped many times and a few false alarms, but he was acting like nothing was going on. So, naturally, I picked up the slack and started freaking our for the both of us. We finally got kids ready enough to go, and Dan thought it was the perfect time to go look at a house on our way to Mom's house. REALLY??? "Well, your mom won't be home for another 1/2 hour, so why not?" Ugh. I mean, he had a point, but I was in no mood to be logical. We went and looked at the house, and then he and Mom suggested that we eat before leaving. I was starting to get a little irked at both of them, because it seemed like no one was believing that I was in labor. "If you don't eat now and they end up keeping you, you won't get to eat until after the baby is born." %@#$ logic again. So, we ate, and we FINALLY headed out. When we got to the hospital, my contractions had slowed down a bit again. We decided that we would take a walk for a bit and try to jump start them before going in. It worked. Kind of. They said my contractions weren't being productive, and that my water hadn't broken (???). I didn't quite get it, but they said it was a REALLY good thing I came in because Annie's heart rate was pretty fast. They were going to go ahead and keep me and induce me right away because they couldn't tell what was causing her distress. "The best way to get her stabilized is to get her out." Yeah...and I thought I was freaking out before that news. There were mixed emotions. "YAY, my wait is OVER!!" and "Holy $#@% I hope everything is alright!!" were going through my head. I wanted to be excited, yet I couldn't enjoy this time 100% because I was worried that Annie was in real trouble. Dan gave me a blessing and reminded me that I'd been promised that we'd both be healthy. I took some comfort in that. Also, after the blessing another comforting thought came to me: "If there were something REALLY wrong, they would be taking her via C-section. They wouldn't induce." I got hooked up to all of the machines, they got the Pitocin going, and I ordered my epidural immediately. (My momma didn't raise no fool...) The doctor and the nurses projected "delivery time" to be somewhere around 9 or 10 am (if I went fast). I fell asleep around 5:00 am, thinking I'd be able to sleep and get plenty of rest before anything exciting happened. I was only dilated to a 3. An hour later, the nurse came in. I woke up. It turned out that she came into the wrong room. It was a GOOD thing she did, though, because I started feeling what they like to call "pressure". I told the nurse, and she checked me. She then began paging the doctor. She also kept telling me not to push. I wasn't. "DON'T PUSH! WILL SOMEONE GET DOCTOR SO-AND-SO! I SAID DON'T PUSH!" Thankfully the on-call doc rushed in, got gloved up, and delivered Annie in time. LOL. We had a similar situation with Karah, but we didn't cut it nearly this close at all. The doctor and nurses kept talking about how they couldn't believe I went from a 3 to delivery in 2 1/2 hours. Annie was perfect. There was NOTHING wrong with her lungs, and they figured she was just "ready" to be born.
We have had quite the adventure getting her here. I definitely have a lot of stories to tell, as do my husband and older kids. The adventure has barely begun. I am going from 2 kids to 3. From what I've heard, that is pretty hard. Dan and I are officially outnumbered. It will definitely be a challenge to our sanity as we add one more to our crew. I am totally up for it!
Thursday I was having contractions. Nothing new there. Dan and I had decided that we weren't going to go into the hospital for contractions anymore, seeing as we just kept getting sent home. We came up with a list of 3 reasons we'd go to the hospital: My water breaking, signs of distress (preeclampsia, bleeding, and so on), and my scheduled induction time. Well, I was fairly active Thursday. I danced while I cleaned, went grocery shopping, and even decided to walk to Jayden's school to pick him up instead of drive. It was a good day. Until about 4:30 pm when I noticed that my pants were wet. Not just a little wet, but "Um, I don't remember peeing my pants..." wet. I called Dan several times, but he was in a meeting at work. I tried calling my mom, too, but she was also in a meeting. I was FREAKING OUT. I finally got a hold of both of them, coordinated getting kids dropped off, and sat down to wait. Dan wasn't at all in a hurry, which, to be honest, was kind of ticking me off. I mean, I know we've had labor stopped many times and a few false alarms, but he was acting like nothing was going on. So, naturally, I picked up the slack and started freaking our for the both of us. We finally got kids ready enough to go, and Dan thought it was the perfect time to go look at a house on our way to Mom's house. REALLY??? "Well, your mom won't be home for another 1/2 hour, so why not?" Ugh. I mean, he had a point, but I was in no mood to be logical. We went and looked at the house, and then he and Mom suggested that we eat before leaving. I was starting to get a little irked at both of them, because it seemed like no one was believing that I was in labor. "If you don't eat now and they end up keeping you, you won't get to eat until after the baby is born." %@#$ logic again. So, we ate, and we FINALLY headed out. When we got to the hospital, my contractions had slowed down a bit again. We decided that we would take a walk for a bit and try to jump start them before going in. It worked. Kind of. They said my contractions weren't being productive, and that my water hadn't broken (???). I didn't quite get it, but they said it was a REALLY good thing I came in because Annie's heart rate was pretty fast. They were going to go ahead and keep me and induce me right away because they couldn't tell what was causing her distress. "The best way to get her stabilized is to get her out." Yeah...and I thought I was freaking out before that news. There were mixed emotions. "YAY, my wait is OVER!!" and "Holy $#@% I hope everything is alright!!" were going through my head. I wanted to be excited, yet I couldn't enjoy this time 100% because I was worried that Annie was in real trouble. Dan gave me a blessing and reminded me that I'd been promised that we'd both be healthy. I took some comfort in that. Also, after the blessing another comforting thought came to me: "If there were something REALLY wrong, they would be taking her via C-section. They wouldn't induce." I got hooked up to all of the machines, they got the Pitocin going, and I ordered my epidural immediately. (My momma didn't raise no fool...) The doctor and the nurses projected "delivery time" to be somewhere around 9 or 10 am (if I went fast). I fell asleep around 5:00 am, thinking I'd be able to sleep and get plenty of rest before anything exciting happened. I was only dilated to a 3. An hour later, the nurse came in. I woke up. It turned out that she came into the wrong room. It was a GOOD thing she did, though, because I started feeling what they like to call "pressure". I told the nurse, and she checked me. She then began paging the doctor. She also kept telling me not to push. I wasn't. "DON'T PUSH! WILL SOMEONE GET DOCTOR SO-AND-SO! I SAID DON'T PUSH!" Thankfully the on-call doc rushed in, got gloved up, and delivered Annie in time. LOL. We had a similar situation with Karah, but we didn't cut it nearly this close at all. The doctor and nurses kept talking about how they couldn't believe I went from a 3 to delivery in 2 1/2 hours. Annie was perfect. There was NOTHING wrong with her lungs, and they figured she was just "ready" to be born.
We have had quite the adventure getting her here. I definitely have a lot of stories to tell, as do my husband and older kids. The adventure has barely begun. I am going from 2 kids to 3. From what I've heard, that is pretty hard. Dan and I are officially outnumbered. It will definitely be a challenge to our sanity as we add one more to our crew. I am totally up for it!
Monday, February 27, 2012
Still Pregnant...
SO, my doctor says it isn't uncommon for moms who have to go through the drugs and bed rest to keep their babies in to do such a good job that the babies don't want to come out once it is safe. Apparently, I did an awesome job, because I have officially been pregnant longer than I've ever been pregnant before. And I am FEELING IT. I am excited, though. I was worried that Annie would be tiny and fragile as a preemie, and that concerned me because she has 2 older siblings that can't wait to hold, help, and play with her. This extra time she's getting will help her be ready for the outpouring of love from them. I know I complain a lot about how uncomfortable being pregnant is. I don't mean to sound like such a wimp. I've just been through so much and now that she can be here, I WANT her here! I want to dress her, play with her, and snuggle her just like the kids. We've been holding our breath for over 2 months and preparing for her arrival. We've had my labor stopped on several occasions, and each time we had a flood of emotions-- scared/anxious, excited/happy, disappointed/sad, grateful/relieved. I'm just ready for the roller coaster to finally come to an end and bring this baby girl home!!
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Beautiful Day, Coolest Mom EVER, and Clean Toilets!
Last week I got a notice that Jayden had an early release day from school this week. I was hoping and praying that the weather would be nice so I could let the kids go out and play for a while. I've felt horrible because my kids have been cooped up inside while I was on bed-rest. I'm not comfortable letting a 4 and 6 year old play outside in an apartment complex unsupervised. I woke up this morning and was disappointed: it was cold, foggy, and wet. Ew. My plans for the kiddos to get some much-needed outside time were being dampened. Pun intended. I dropped Jay off at school and then sulked home to get ready for my doctor's appointment. (No changes from yesterday, if you can't already tell...I think I've finally come to grips with it.) Karah went to a friend's house for a while, and I got some much-needed kid-"help"-free cleaning done. I was so focused on my cleaning that I didn't notice the sun peeking out and temperatures rising. I was SO happy when I walked outside to get Jayden!! It was in the 70s and BEAUTIFUL!! The roads were drying up, too, making it PERFECT for the kids to play. We got home and Karah got home shortly after. I opened all of my windows, opened the front door wide, turned on my Bon Jovi Pandora station, and promptly kicked my kiddos outside. Our apartment faces an open field and as long as they stay there I can watch them as I clean my living room and kitchen, which needed attention anyway. The neighborhood kids congregated out front, and it was just so awesome to me! It has been SO long since I've been able to just let the kids run around and PLAY. They played baseball, kick ball, freeze tag, got out our side walk chalk, and just did KID stuff. It was great.
After a while, Jayden started getting a little bossy and copping an attitude with the other kids. I tried to have a talk with him, but he thought he'd be macho and cop an attitude with me. He THOUGHT that since he was in "public" and surrounded by his peers that he could get away with that crap. Oh, ho ho, that boy found out that that doesn't fly with me. Back when I was a kid, one of my mom's favorite forms of discipline for back talking or bad attitude was to have us scrub toilets. When Jayden started being a snot to me in front of his friends, I went into I-Am-My-Mother-Mode. "That's it, Jay, you need to go inside and scrub my toilet. You will NOT have a potty-mouth like that with me, young man!!" As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I about smacked myself in the forehead. The kid LOVES cleaning toilets! This isn't going to be a punishment! I was totally caught off guard when the boy started to put up a fight! This might actually work!! He said a few more snarky things to me and I had had enough. "Ok, how does this sound, Jay...you can either change your attitude, clean ONE toilet and come back out and play, OR, I can spank you in front of your friends, you can clean TWO toilets, and I pack up your Wii. Which will it be?" I had about eight pairs of eyes bugging out at me. Jayden opted to change his attitude and clean one toilet. After he went inside one of the little boys tapped me on the shoulder. "Yes?" I asked. "You are the COOLEST MOM EVER!!" That was followed by the other kids nodding their heads in agreement. I was elated. I know my son had an entirely different opinion at the time, but I will graciously accept the title of Coolest Mom Ever from the neighborhood children. Jayden scrubbed the toilet, and all was well for about an hour. Then one of the little kids started pulling the same crud that Jayden did. I had told the other parents I'd keep an eye on them, so I was the only witness. I usually try to not discipline other people's kids, especially since I don't know these people very well. But something had to be done and this kid's parents weren't close. I looked him in the eye and told him, "I have TWO toilets. Jayden only cleaned one. Do I need to call your dad and let him know you need to clean one of my toilets for being disrespectful to me?" I thought the eyes were going to pop out of the kid's head. The other kids stopped what they were doing and jaws dropped to the floor. He apologized and everyone played nice. I decided to tell the dad what I'd threatened. I was terrified, but I didn't want him hearing it from the kid just in case the kid decided to change the story. The dad laughed and said that I was welcome to make his kids clean toilets and scrub floors if they pulled an attitude with me. *Whew*
It was an amazing day. My kids played outside for HOURS. For the first time in...well...forever, I felt like a REAL mom. The type of mom that has a clean house and snacks waiting for not just her kids, but the neighbor kids as well. The type of mom that goes out and teaches the kids how to play Red Rover and kickball. The type of mom who will have ANY kid who tracks mud into the house clean it up. The mom that my mom was to me. Everyone LOVED hanging out at my house because my mom treated every kid like her own. They got the same love and attention we got and they didn't catch any breaks for their behavior. She provided several of my friends and my sibling's friends with some much needed structure. She IS respected to this day by everyone who walks through her door, and she still has other people's children call her "Momma My-Maiden-Name". I have always wanted to be that type of mom, but due to work, school, bed rest, and things I've totally let get in the way, I've been unable to do so. I am switching back into "Grateful-For-My-Bed-Rest-Experience" mode because it truly opened my eyes to what I was missing out on and provided me with an opportunity to make up for it. I hope to be able to maintain my love for keeping house and doing the whole "Mom-Thing". I have truly been enjoying myself, and I hope my family has as well.
After a while, Jayden started getting a little bossy and copping an attitude with the other kids. I tried to have a talk with him, but he thought he'd be macho and cop an attitude with me. He THOUGHT that since he was in "public" and surrounded by his peers that he could get away with that crap. Oh, ho ho, that boy found out that that doesn't fly with me. Back when I was a kid, one of my mom's favorite forms of discipline for back talking or bad attitude was to have us scrub toilets. When Jayden started being a snot to me in front of his friends, I went into I-Am-My-Mother-Mode. "That's it, Jay, you need to go inside and scrub my toilet. You will NOT have a potty-mouth like that with me, young man!!" As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I about smacked myself in the forehead. The kid LOVES cleaning toilets! This isn't going to be a punishment! I was totally caught off guard when the boy started to put up a fight! This might actually work!! He said a few more snarky things to me and I had had enough. "Ok, how does this sound, Jay...you can either change your attitude, clean ONE toilet and come back out and play, OR, I can spank you in front of your friends, you can clean TWO toilets, and I pack up your Wii. Which will it be?" I had about eight pairs of eyes bugging out at me. Jayden opted to change his attitude and clean one toilet. After he went inside one of the little boys tapped me on the shoulder. "Yes?" I asked. "You are the COOLEST MOM EVER!!" That was followed by the other kids nodding their heads in agreement. I was elated. I know my son had an entirely different opinion at the time, but I will graciously accept the title of Coolest Mom Ever from the neighborhood children. Jayden scrubbed the toilet, and all was well for about an hour. Then one of the little kids started pulling the same crud that Jayden did. I had told the other parents I'd keep an eye on them, so I was the only witness. I usually try to not discipline other people's kids, especially since I don't know these people very well. But something had to be done and this kid's parents weren't close. I looked him in the eye and told him, "I have TWO toilets. Jayden only cleaned one. Do I need to call your dad and let him know you need to clean one of my toilets for being disrespectful to me?" I thought the eyes were going to pop out of the kid's head. The other kids stopped what they were doing and jaws dropped to the floor. He apologized and everyone played nice. I decided to tell the dad what I'd threatened. I was terrified, but I didn't want him hearing it from the kid just in case the kid decided to change the story. The dad laughed and said that I was welcome to make his kids clean toilets and scrub floors if they pulled an attitude with me. *Whew*
It was an amazing day. My kids played outside for HOURS. For the first time in...well...forever, I felt like a REAL mom. The type of mom that has a clean house and snacks waiting for not just her kids, but the neighbor kids as well. The type of mom that goes out and teaches the kids how to play Red Rover and kickball. The type of mom who will have ANY kid who tracks mud into the house clean it up. The mom that my mom was to me. Everyone LOVED hanging out at my house because my mom treated every kid like her own. They got the same love and attention we got and they didn't catch any breaks for their behavior. She provided several of my friends and my sibling's friends with some much needed structure. She IS respected to this day by everyone who walks through her door, and she still has other people's children call her "Momma My-Maiden-Name". I have always wanted to be that type of mom, but due to work, school, bed rest, and things I've totally let get in the way, I've been unable to do so. I am switching back into "Grateful-For-My-Bed-Rest-Experience" mode because it truly opened my eyes to what I was missing out on and provided me with an opportunity to make up for it. I hope to be able to maintain my love for keeping house and doing the whole "Mom-Thing". I have truly been enjoying myself, and I hope my family has as well.
Flu- Round 2
Who got to spend all Monday night puking and ended up in the hospital for IV fluids Tuesday morning? THIS GAL!! I love how my kids love to share EVERYTHING, including their flu-germs. I am FINALLY starting to feel better, but my little Karah-Bear is starting to feel yucky. Hopefully she doesn't get it as bad as Jay and I did. Part of me wants to rip my hair out and scream to the Heavens: "WHAT HAVE I DONE TO PISS YOU OFF??", but then this pops in my head: "At least we are getting over this before Annie gets here". Of course, it WOULD be nice to avoid this little flu all together, but since that apparently wasn't possible, I am really glad we are getting it out of our way.
Yesterday WAS interesting, though. I had planned on surprising Jay at school for lunch and about a gazillion other things for Valentine's Day. I was not planning on being hooked up to IVs and junk for most of my day. Whatever they gave me knocked me out, so I was pretty much comatose when I got home. Karah had spent the morning charming people at my mom's work while I was in the hospital, and she came home around lunch time. No problem. She typically turns on a show and lays on the couch when it is nap time. Occasionally she falls asleep, but not always. I expected that she would watch a show and possibly take a nap while I took a nap. I did not expect her to decide to "help" me because I was sick. First, she knew it was Valentine's Day, so she wanted to look extra special for Daddy. With my make up. My bathroom looked like a powder-bomb had gone off. So, she decided to clean it up. Strawberry toothpaste oughta do it, right? You know, clean mirrors and counter tops?? She abandoned the bathroom before it got any worse and moved to the kitchen (Thank GOODNESS). She saw that our powdered sugar container was getting low, and remembered that I had bought a new bag to put in there. Take a 4 year old, add a full bag of powdered sugar, and just imagine what my kitchen looked like. If you think it looked like that "snow" scene from Tim Burton's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, you guessed right. Moving right along. Since the powdered sugar was giving her trouble, she decided to move on to a smaller task: refilling the cinnamon shaker. She said she actually did that one without a mess...until the GLASS shaker slipped out of her hands when she was putting it away...it shattered all over the floor. *sigh* So now we have powdered sugar, glass, and cinnamon all over my kitchen, along with a whole thing of make up powder and strawberry toothpaste all over my bathroom. I woke up to an extremely upset little girl. She felt SO BAD for all of the messes she made because she was honestly trying to make my life a little better. She knew I was sick and not feeling well, and wanted to help. We came up with some Karah-Safe jobs she could do to help me out and then set to work on cleaning up the messes. After Jay got home, I did need to call in a life line to my husband to bring me some Dr Pepper...the child was in a MOOD!! Totally not like him, but I think he was just exhausted from being sick this weekend. He went to bed early, no arguments. All in all, despite the disasters (and there were a few more after I woke up) we had a pretty good day.
I've been having contractions pretty steadily now for the last week. Like, anywhere from 4-6 minutes apart regularly. And when one hits it makes me gasp a bit. The kids think it is hilarious. "I mean it! Clean your *gasp* room please!" (with the last part in soprano...) Yeah. Real intimidating. The problem with these contractions is that THEY AREN'T DOING ANYTHING. They are annoying as crap and my muscles are hurting like crazy, but I haven't dilated enough for the doc get this kid out of me. He said he wasn't going to stop me if I actually went into labor, but he said he wasn't going to do anything to speed things up right now, either. Gee, thanks, Dude. It is a blessing and a curse. Blessing because he is letting our family get over this flu-crap before Annie gets here, and curse because I am experiencing all of the pains of labor without receiving any "fruits" from it. Dan says we aren't going back to the hospital until my water breaks, and I agree with him. We've gone in a total of SIX times this pregnancy only to have my labor stopped or slowed each time. It is annoying. And expensive. And annoying. (Yes, I am aware I said "annoying" twice, and I will say it again. Because IT IS.) I have a doctor's appointment today, and hopefully there has been SOME change since yesterday. At least enough for him to stop giving me a patronizing look and DO something. I really like this doctor, but I'm at that point where I'm pissed that he's a man because he may have helped deliver thousands of babies, but he's NEVER carried or pushed one out. Therefore, he is starting to irk me every time he says "Just a little longer. You can do it! It is better this way, anyway." I honestly think he would feel a little different if someone was kicking him in the family jewels every 4-6 minutes and then telling him "The longer you endure this, the better off you'll both be!" *deep breath* Sounds like it is time for me to repeat "At least we are getting over the flu before Annie gets here" a few times...
Yesterday WAS interesting, though. I had planned on surprising Jay at school for lunch and about a gazillion other things for Valentine's Day. I was not planning on being hooked up to IVs and junk for most of my day. Whatever they gave me knocked me out, so I was pretty much comatose when I got home. Karah had spent the morning charming people at my mom's work while I was in the hospital, and she came home around lunch time. No problem. She typically turns on a show and lays on the couch when it is nap time. Occasionally she falls asleep, but not always. I expected that she would watch a show and possibly take a nap while I took a nap. I did not expect her to decide to "help" me because I was sick. First, she knew it was Valentine's Day, so she wanted to look extra special for Daddy. With my make up. My bathroom looked like a powder-bomb had gone off. So, she decided to clean it up. Strawberry toothpaste oughta do it, right? You know, clean mirrors and counter tops?? She abandoned the bathroom before it got any worse and moved to the kitchen (Thank GOODNESS). She saw that our powdered sugar container was getting low, and remembered that I had bought a new bag to put in there. Take a 4 year old, add a full bag of powdered sugar, and just imagine what my kitchen looked like. If you think it looked like that "snow" scene from Tim Burton's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, you guessed right. Moving right along. Since the powdered sugar was giving her trouble, she decided to move on to a smaller task: refilling the cinnamon shaker. She said she actually did that one without a mess...until the GLASS shaker slipped out of her hands when she was putting it away...it shattered all over the floor. *sigh* So now we have powdered sugar, glass, and cinnamon all over my kitchen, along with a whole thing of make up powder and strawberry toothpaste all over my bathroom. I woke up to an extremely upset little girl. She felt SO BAD for all of the messes she made because she was honestly trying to make my life a little better. She knew I was sick and not feeling well, and wanted to help. We came up with some Karah-Safe jobs she could do to help me out and then set to work on cleaning up the messes. After Jay got home, I did need to call in a life line to my husband to bring me some Dr Pepper...the child was in a MOOD!! Totally not like him, but I think he was just exhausted from being sick this weekend. He went to bed early, no arguments. All in all, despite the disasters (and there were a few more after I woke up) we had a pretty good day.
I've been having contractions pretty steadily now for the last week. Like, anywhere from 4-6 minutes apart regularly. And when one hits it makes me gasp a bit. The kids think it is hilarious. "I mean it! Clean your *gasp* room please!" (with the last part in soprano...) Yeah. Real intimidating. The problem with these contractions is that THEY AREN'T DOING ANYTHING. They are annoying as crap and my muscles are hurting like crazy, but I haven't dilated enough for the doc get this kid out of me. He said he wasn't going to stop me if I actually went into labor, but he said he wasn't going to do anything to speed things up right now, either. Gee, thanks, Dude. It is a blessing and a curse. Blessing because he is letting our family get over this flu-crap before Annie gets here, and curse because I am experiencing all of the pains of labor without receiving any "fruits" from it. Dan says we aren't going back to the hospital until my water breaks, and I agree with him. We've gone in a total of SIX times this pregnancy only to have my labor stopped or slowed each time. It is annoying. And expensive. And annoying. (Yes, I am aware I said "annoying" twice, and I will say it again. Because IT IS.) I have a doctor's appointment today, and hopefully there has been SOME change since yesterday. At least enough for him to stop giving me a patronizing look and DO something. I really like this doctor, but I'm at that point where I'm pissed that he's a man because he may have helped deliver thousands of babies, but he's NEVER carried or pushed one out. Therefore, he is starting to irk me every time he says "Just a little longer. You can do it! It is better this way, anyway." I honestly think he would feel a little different if someone was kicking him in the family jewels every 4-6 minutes and then telling him "The longer you endure this, the better off you'll both be!" *deep breath* Sounds like it is time for me to repeat "At least we are getting over the flu before Annie gets here" a few times...
Friday, February 10, 2012
A Family Tradition
Almost eight years ago, Dan and I met. We dated. We fell in love. He proposed to me and I said yes. We went to Build-a-Bear Workshop to celebrate and made each other bears. When Jayden was born, we got him one. When Karah was born, Jayden made her a bunny. She still carries that thing everywhere she goes and sleeps with it every night. We figured that since the doc eased up on my restrictions (and I actually took if fairly easy today) that we would keep up our tradition and let the kids make Annie one. There were about 30 different animals they could choose from. There were pink bears, sparkly bears, purple bears, brown bears, white bears, dogs, cats, penguins, chipmunks, and such. Jayden wanted the pink cat, where Karah wanted the white bear with rainbow polka-dots. Then Jayden wanted the Texas Longhorn (That's my boy!!) and Karah wanted the pink bear with hearts all over it. Jayden wanted the purple bear with peace signs, and Karah wanted the baby-pink bear. They were really sweet about it. They would present the reasons why they liked that particular animal for Annie and then talk about it. They would point out pros and cons of each one. There were NO fights (!!!). I was pretty sure we were going to end up with something obnoxiously girly. Not that I would really mind, but everything they'd picked out was either sparkly, pink, or purple with pink. They were going back and forth between the baby pink bear and the hot pink bear with a heart nose when Jayden said he wanted to do "one more walk-by". Karah went with him. They would stop every few feet to touch and make sure it was soft enough. They stopped in front of an orange cat. Karah picked it up and said "This one." Jayden felt it, and then nodded his head in agreement. It is the CUTEST little cat. They each did the little "heart ceremony" and got to help stuff the bear. They decided to name her "Kitty-Anne". We had SO much fun, and the kids got along great. These two kids are so excited and ready for their little sister to get here! Annie is one lucky little lady!
Flu
Apparently our family can't catch a break! Jay came home from school on Thursday feeling just fine. He did his homework, had a snack, helped me clean up his Lego table, and was about to help me clean up the hallway when he started complaining of a tummy-ache. Now, my kids are good kids, but sometimes they make stuff up to get out of cleaning. He asked if he could just take a break and watch a cartoon because his tummy hurt. I told him if his tummy REALLY hurt, he could go lay down on his bed, but if he'd just help me finish cleaning up the last few things in the hall we could watch a cartoon together. He went straight to bed. The kid was asleep within 2 minutes of laying down. It was only 5:00 pm. I tried to wake him up because I was afraid he'd be bouncing off the walls by 7:00 pm. He was OUT. My radar went off. This is NOT normal behavior for him. He slept hard for about 3 hours. When he woke up, he ran straight for the bathroom. That is where the poor kid spent the next 4 hours. We had to bring him a bucket because he was experiencing double-trouble. He kept asking why being sick felt so horrible. I explained to him that his body had lots of germs in it and that it was trying to get all of the germs out as fast as possible. I felt SO bad for him, but couldn't help chuckling at some of his comments. After a few rounds of vomiting, he called out "Well, I just killed a BUNCH of germs!!". He also begged us to take him to the hospital a few times. Dan went out and got him 7-Up, Popsicles, and Gatorade. Jay had a hard time keeping anything down, and he absolutely refused to leave the bathroom for any reason. It had been about an hour since he'd experienced either unpleasant experience. He kept saying all he wanted to do was sleep, but that he couldn't get comfortable on the toilet (duh). We finally coaxed him off the toilet by promising him that we would bring in his little couch and let him sleep next to the toilet. (THANK GOODNESS I scrubbed the crap out of that thing *literally* the day before!) Dan gave him a Priesthood blessing during all of this, and Jay said the sweetest prayer right before he went to sleep. In the blessing, Dan said that Jay would experience the symptoms of the sickness, but that it would be over quickly if he had faith and prayed. So, he prayed and asked Heavenly Father to help him calm down enough to sleep. He also asked Him to bless Annie and make her healthy and strong so she wouldn't get sick. He fell right to sleep and woke up happy. He was still a little queasy this morning and he took a nap this afternoon, but by 4:00 this evening, he was fever-free and helping me sanitize the kitchen. I am glad it was a 24 hour bug, and I hope that Jayden is the only one who got it. If the rest of us catch it, I hope it is over before Annie gets here!!
Bouncy Chair!
I have AMAZING friends and family. I went over to my mom's house tonight and this was wrapped and waiting for us! "To: Annie, Love: Aunt Krissa (my sister in law), Uncle Matt (brother), Cousins Rylee and Nolan (their kids), and "Aunt" Caity (a good friend of mine). A bouncy chair was pretty much the only thing left on my list to get. This particular bouncy chair was THE bouncy chair I really wanted, and I've been watching 3 of them this week on E-bay. Thank you so much, you guys! The picture doesn't do it justice. It is SO cute and SO soft! I know Annie will LOVE it! Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU!!
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
FREEEEEEEEEEEE-DOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If I were physically capable of doing back flips, I would SOOOO be doing them right now!!! Today has been absolutely awesome. I got my last shot. I only have 4 more days left of taking Procardia. And, the blessings of all blessings: He relaxed my bed rest rules!! WAH-FREAKING-HOOO!!! He would still rather me stay down the majority of the time, but he said that I CAN "nest" a bit and go shopping as long as I ride in one of those little motor cart things. He that he would still prefer me to make it another week and a half, but that he would not stop her if she came at this point. He said to "take it slow and easy" with my new-found freedom and to have fun. I shot out of there like a bat out of hell. I have an almost 2 page list of chores I need to get done before this baby is born and, bless his heart, Dan hasn't been able to REALLY get started on it. My bathroom is sparkling for the first time in 2 months. I picked up my own kid from school for the first time in 2 months. My fridge is stocked with REAL food to make REAL meals instead of the random foodstuffs my husband comes up with for the first time in 2 months (again, bless his heart). I may or may not have not used the little motor cart thingy... (The motor cart baskets at Kroger are TINY!!) And I am now understanding WHY my doc told me to "take it slow and easy" and to try to stay down as much as possible. I was hurting BEFORE I broke out of bed, and I am DEFINITELY hurting now. I regret having rolled my eyes when Doc told me he wanted me to still stay down as much as possible. I'm starting to think he MIGHT be worth listening to... I AM excited about being able to do "light" housekeeping and "light" shopping in preparation for Annie. Oh, SO excited!! But I need to be responsible with my glorious new freedom so that I can still be conscious and capable when "Baby Time" officially comes!
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Things My Kids Have Said
Ok, I know I've posted a lot of these things to Facebook already, but I'm going to go ahead and blog about them here, too. These are conversations/silly things my kids have said during my time on bed rest:
Karah: "Mommy, the other day I pretended I was pregnant and laid in my bed while I told Jayden to clean my room. I would help sometimes and throw toys from my bed to the basket. It is fun being pregnant!"
Jayden: "Dad, Mommy's having another...contraption?" (After we tried to correct the "attraction")
Karah: (After seeing a BowFlex commercial) "Mom! We HAVE to get one of those so your tummy won't be so HUGE!!!"
Karah: (Immediately after I rolled out of bed) "Mommy, go back to bed. You look like you need it!"
This morning I heard a knock on the door. I wasn't dressed, yet, and Karah beat me to the door. This is what I heard as I frantically searched for my clothes:
FedEx Man: "Is your mommy home?"
Karah: "Yeah, but she's pregnant and laying down on bed rest in her bed because she's pregnant with a baby and having contraptions because she's pregnant and on bed rest. My mom is PREGNANT!"
FedEx Man: (Obviously trying not to laugh) "Will you let her know I have a package for her?"
Me: "I'll be right out! I'm sorry!"
Karah: "Get back in bed, I'll handle it!"
FedEx Man: (Can't hold it in anymore) "I can just set it down-"
Karah: "I'll take it, thank you!"
Me: (Finally...covered...enough to run out there) "Thanks!"
Karah: "I'm telling Daddy!! Where's your phone!"
I could hear him laughing all the way back to his truck...
Karah: "Mommy, the other day I pretended I was pregnant and laid in my bed while I told Jayden to clean my room. I would help sometimes and throw toys from my bed to the basket. It is fun being pregnant!"
Jayden: "Dad, Mommy's having another...contraption?" (After we tried to correct the "attraction")
Karah: (After seeing a BowFlex commercial) "Mom! We HAVE to get one of those so your tummy won't be so HUGE!!!"
Karah: (Immediately after I rolled out of bed) "Mommy, go back to bed. You look like you need it!"
This morning I heard a knock on the door. I wasn't dressed, yet, and Karah beat me to the door. This is what I heard as I frantically searched for my clothes:
FedEx Man: "Is your mommy home?"
Karah: "Yeah, but she's pregnant and laying down on bed rest in her bed because she's pregnant with a baby and having contraptions because she's pregnant and on bed rest. My mom is PREGNANT!"
FedEx Man: (Obviously trying not to laugh) "Will you let her know I have a package for her?"
Me: "I'll be right out! I'm sorry!"
Karah: "Get back in bed, I'll handle it!"
FedEx Man: (Can't hold it in anymore) "I can just set it down-"
Karah: "I'll take it, thank you!"
Me: (Finally...covered...enough to run out there) "Thanks!"
Karah: "I'm telling Daddy!! Where's your phone!"
I could hear him laughing all the way back to his truck...
Waiting Game
No, I am not going to have a little breakdown on how emotionally drained I am. I am PHYSICALLY spent, lol. I have been having painful contractions since Sunday, and Annie has officially "dropped", making a LOT of pressure and pain when I try to get up. Two things I am doing my best to avoid. I will admit that over the weekend I may have over-done it. I think I've hit my "nesting" stage. I thought I was restless a few weeks ago, but it was nothing compared to THIS. Dan has gotten mad at me several times because he'll catch me wiping down the counters and mirrors while I'm "washing my hands" or putting toys/clothes away "on my way back to the bathroom/couch". He keeps reminding me that I've always been a terrible liar and to sit my butt back down. Grouch.
Anyway, all of that led up to Sunday, when the REAL pain started. These are hard-core-where-is-my-epidural contractions. I was afraid we'd have to go back to the hospital. I didn't want to. We were in the middle of watching Hook as a family. All of us were quiet, comfortable (with the exception of my contractions) and just plain enjoying each others' company (which is saying something, because I thought my kids were going to kill each other earlier that day). I didn't want to disrupt that with ANOTHER trip to the hospital. So, I when I noticed the contractions getting closer together, I decided to stop announcing them. I know, I know!! The point of contractions getting closer is to signal that it is getting closer to the baby coming! I get it! But the movie was almost over and I wanted to have that time with my family before all heck broke loose. I forgot that my children are little Tattle-Tales. Jay was snuggled up to me and could feel me tense up when a contraction hit. "Dad! Mommy's having another attraction!!" Thanks, Son. Dan suggested I call my mom to see if she'd be able to watch the kids if the "attractions" got any closer. I called her during a snack break, and she was already planning on coming over. Apparently the Superbowl was also on Sunday. Dan and I figured that would be perfect. We would finish the movie, let Mom watch the rest of the game, and we would go to the hospital if it got to that point. Thankfully, after Mom got here the contractions started slowing down. She decided to stay the night just in case they picked back up. They've been off and on since then. My stomach and back muscles are killing me. My contractions aren't consistently close enough to warrant a trip to the hospital yet, but they are DEFINITELY painful enough to be a pain in the butt. Har har. I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow. Part of me wants to wait until tomorrow. But the little kid in me wants this pain. to. stop. NOW. I'm practically immobile right now. Even if I wanted to, I can't straighten up "on my way back to the couch" without bursting into tears. I've talked to the nurse, and she's advised me to just wait until the contractions are 5-6 minutes apart for an hour straight. They are about 10-15 minutes apart consistently for the last 2 days. UGH!! This type of waiting SUCKS!!! I just keep chanting "tomorrow morning, tomorrow morning" in my head. I get my last injection, I get taken off my meds on Sunday, and after tomorrow he won't stop me. I just have to make it to tomorrow morning....
Anyway, all of that led up to Sunday, when the REAL pain started. These are hard-core-where-is-my-epidural contractions. I was afraid we'd have to go back to the hospital. I didn't want to. We were in the middle of watching Hook as a family. All of us were quiet, comfortable (with the exception of my contractions) and just plain enjoying each others' company (which is saying something, because I thought my kids were going to kill each other earlier that day). I didn't want to disrupt that with ANOTHER trip to the hospital. So, I when I noticed the contractions getting closer together, I decided to stop announcing them. I know, I know!! The point of contractions getting closer is to signal that it is getting closer to the baby coming! I get it! But the movie was almost over and I wanted to have that time with my family before all heck broke loose. I forgot that my children are little Tattle-Tales. Jay was snuggled up to me and could feel me tense up when a contraction hit. "Dad! Mommy's having another attraction!!" Thanks, Son. Dan suggested I call my mom to see if she'd be able to watch the kids if the "attractions" got any closer. I called her during a snack break, and she was already planning on coming over. Apparently the Superbowl was also on Sunday. Dan and I figured that would be perfect. We would finish the movie, let Mom watch the rest of the game, and we would go to the hospital if it got to that point. Thankfully, after Mom got here the contractions started slowing down. She decided to stay the night just in case they picked back up. They've been off and on since then. My stomach and back muscles are killing me. My contractions aren't consistently close enough to warrant a trip to the hospital yet, but they are DEFINITELY painful enough to be a pain in the butt. Har har. I have a doctor's appointment tomorrow. Part of me wants to wait until tomorrow. But the little kid in me wants this pain. to. stop. NOW. I'm practically immobile right now. Even if I wanted to, I can't straighten up "on my way back to the couch" without bursting into tears. I've talked to the nurse, and she's advised me to just wait until the contractions are 5-6 minutes apart for an hour straight. They are about 10-15 minutes apart consistently for the last 2 days. UGH!! This type of waiting SUCKS!!! I just keep chanting "tomorrow morning, tomorrow morning" in my head. I get my last injection, I get taken off my meds on Sunday, and after tomorrow he won't stop me. I just have to make it to tomorrow morning....
Friday, February 3, 2012
Baby Stuff!!
My online shopping spree is arriving!! I am SOOO excited!! Dan and I have been talking about how this baby might just be our last, seeing as each of my pregnancies have gotten progressively worse. So, I have decided to throw "gender neutral" stuff out the door. Dan is just going to have to deal with pushing around a Pink Cinderella stroller:
I LOVE this stroller. I know that it is white with light pink, but I plan to Scotch Guard the ever-living-crap out of it. For those of you who have known me for at least 5 seconds, you know that I am a Disney fanatic. People have stopped playing Disney Trivia with me because there is no point. They can't win. Karah is no different. She shares my Disney enthusiasm and at times exceeds it. So, imagine my excitement when I found the "Disney Princess Royal Ride" travel system. I knew that Karah and I would LOVE going places with Annie and her "Royal Ride". It came TODAY. Karah saw the huge box and couldn't wait for Dan to get home to open it. I'll admit, neither could I. I sat down on the floor and pried the box open. Karah dragged out the pieces. I was thinking in my head, "Oh, she is going to be ecstatic when she sees Cinderella on it!!" and I was so proud of her for wanting to help assemble it. Until she left the pieces on the floor and dove into her new "fort", that is. Oh well. She occasionally emerged from her castle and "Ooohed" and "Aaaahed" appropriately. Once it started resembling a stroller she ran and got a baby-doll to "test it out" to make sure that Annie would be safe and cute in it. It passed. It is much cuter than I thought it would be, to he honest. I can't wait to put Annie in it!!
I took pity on Dan when I was looking for a diaper bag. Well, not really. It is just that the diaper bag that surpasses all diaper bags (in my own personal opinion, of course) didn't come in any girlie colors. I had the choice of plain black or black and this weird looking green. Other than the lack of pink in it's color pallet, this diaper bag is AWESOME. We found it (brand new) with all but one of the accessories on Ebay for pretty cheap. This thing ROCKS. I watched the video for this diaper bag, and I kid you not, a pillar of light from Heaven above was shining down on my computer and I heard angels singing. I'm one of those women who uses her diaper bag as her purse. (Let's be honest, is there any SANE woman out there who doesn't??) I have always hated carrying diaper bags because they give you this huge pocket for everything and that is it. I am constantly losing my keys, wallet, make-up, and such in the chaos of lotion, wipes, toys, diapers, snacks, pacifiers, burp cloths, bottles, etc. I have to dig and dig and dig to find anything (which is not always possible without finally screaming in rage and dumping the entire thing out at the check out counter to find my flipping wallet...). This diaper bag not only has lots of pockets connected to it, but it has separate accessories that you can keep bottles, cell phones, wallet, snacks, and such in that clip onto the bag (outside AND inside!!). We are talking Ultimate Organization here. It is called the Clic-It. Mine came yesterday. I've already packed my make-up bag, wallet pouch, and put their little key chain thingy on my keys. I have to send the big bag part back, though, because there was a huge tear in it. Sad day, but they said I should have my new-not-torn one by the end of next week, so I'm not going to fret (yet). Here is what it looks like:
Kinda manly, I know, but then I imagine slipping my hand in the bag and immediately finding my keys clipped to the side and I'm over it. I AM currently open to suggestions, however, on how to girl-ify it. :)
I LOVE this stroller. I know that it is white with light pink, but I plan to Scotch Guard the ever-living-crap out of it. For those of you who have known me for at least 5 seconds, you know that I am a Disney fanatic. People have stopped playing Disney Trivia with me because there is no point. They can't win. Karah is no different. She shares my Disney enthusiasm and at times exceeds it. So, imagine my excitement when I found the "Disney Princess Royal Ride" travel system. I knew that Karah and I would LOVE going places with Annie and her "Royal Ride". It came TODAY. Karah saw the huge box and couldn't wait for Dan to get home to open it. I'll admit, neither could I. I sat down on the floor and pried the box open. Karah dragged out the pieces. I was thinking in my head, "Oh, she is going to be ecstatic when she sees Cinderella on it!!" and I was so proud of her for wanting to help assemble it. Until she left the pieces on the floor and dove into her new "fort", that is. Oh well. She occasionally emerged from her castle and "Ooohed" and "Aaaahed" appropriately. Once it started resembling a stroller she ran and got a baby-doll to "test it out" to make sure that Annie would be safe and cute in it. It passed. It is much cuter than I thought it would be, to he honest. I can't wait to put Annie in it!!
I took pity on Dan when I was looking for a diaper bag. Well, not really. It is just that the diaper bag that surpasses all diaper bags (in my own personal opinion, of course) didn't come in any girlie colors. I had the choice of plain black or black and this weird looking green. Other than the lack of pink in it's color pallet, this diaper bag is AWESOME. We found it (brand new) with all but one of the accessories on Ebay for pretty cheap. This thing ROCKS. I watched the video for this diaper bag, and I kid you not, a pillar of light from Heaven above was shining down on my computer and I heard angels singing. I'm one of those women who uses her diaper bag as her purse. (Let's be honest, is there any SANE woman out there who doesn't??) I have always hated carrying diaper bags because they give you this huge pocket for everything and that is it. I am constantly losing my keys, wallet, make-up, and such in the chaos of lotion, wipes, toys, diapers, snacks, pacifiers, burp cloths, bottles, etc. I have to dig and dig and dig to find anything (which is not always possible without finally screaming in rage and dumping the entire thing out at the check out counter to find my flipping wallet...). This diaper bag not only has lots of pockets connected to it, but it has separate accessories that you can keep bottles, cell phones, wallet, snacks, and such in that clip onto the bag (outside AND inside!!). We are talking Ultimate Organization here. It is called the Clic-It. Mine came yesterday. I've already packed my make-up bag, wallet pouch, and put their little key chain thingy on my keys. I have to send the big bag part back, though, because there was a huge tear in it. Sad day, but they said I should have my new-not-torn one by the end of next week, so I'm not going to fret (yet). Here is what it looks like:
Kinda manly, I know, but then I imagine slipping my hand in the bag and immediately finding my keys clipped to the side and I'm over it. I AM currently open to suggestions, however, on how to girl-ify it. :)
Thursday, February 2, 2012
Bribery
If you have never used bribery to some extent with your kids, then your "kids" are not of the human variety. Lately I have grown tired of asking the kids to clean their rooms or help with other household chores only to be ignored. I am not the only one who has grown frustrated with me being on bed rest. I love them to pieces. I really do. It is just stressful on everyone when our house looks like the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina instead of the comforting environment it is supposed to be. They come home from school or play, kick off their shoes, drop their bags, and drag their toys to the living room, our room, bathrooms, or kitchen because they can't see the floors of their rooms anymore. Their bathroom was a NIGHTMARE. Strawberry toothpaste all over the counters, hair crap all over the floor and mirrors, bath toys everywhere, and the oh-so-lovely-evidence of a 6 year old boy all over the toilet. Dan can only do so much. He gets home from work around 6 pm, takes Jay to Karate almost immediately, eats dinner around 7:30 pm, gets the kids ready for bed at 8, fights with them for at least 1/2 an hour (sometimes more) then he is finally able to assess the mess around him close to 9:00 pm. If he doesn't have any clients contact him with problems with their websites, that is. I have tried to give him time to relax and wind down, but it just isn't practical or possible until I can start pitching in again. We have had help, don't get me wrong, but I would literally need to have a live-in maid to keep up with my little mess-makers. It has gotten to the point where they don't care if I revoke their tv/video game privileges because (and this is REALLY sad) they know it is more of a punishment for me. So, again, desperate times call for desperate measures. Jayden's new-found fascination with Star Wars has opened up a whole new world of possibilities for me to bribe him. Yes. Bribe. He has expressed over and over again how he WISHES he had REAL light saber. Well, I got online and found this:
Oh yeah. And it is only $8.99. (SCORE!!) I told him that for every day he kept his room clean and helped with other household chores, I would put a sticker on a calendar. When he filled his calendar, he would get his light saber. Karah was not about to be left out of this super-sweet deal. She isn't sure if she wants a light saber or a new outfit for her doll, but I told her we could decide when her calendar was filled up. Ladies and gents, I asked them to clean their bathroom yesterday. Those kiddos SCRUBBED that bathroom. They not only picked up their toys, clothes, and garbage, but they SCRUBBED it. Mirrors, counters, TOILET, tub, floors, you name it. I thought that they would put up a fight today when I mentioned cleaning their rooms. Nope. They also picked up the living room. I might just get used to this. I'm going to hang their calendars up in the main room of the house and put a picture of their prize above it. That way they will be able to mark their progress and remember why they are working so hard. I am SO proud of my kids. I know we are only on day 2, but they've made it farther than I thought they would. I just hope that if they keep this up Dan and I can come up with some good rewards in the future that are free, lol.
Oh yeah. And it is only $8.99. (SCORE!!) I told him that for every day he kept his room clean and helped with other household chores, I would put a sticker on a calendar. When he filled his calendar, he would get his light saber. Karah was not about to be left out of this super-sweet deal. She isn't sure if she wants a light saber or a new outfit for her doll, but I told her we could decide when her calendar was filled up. Ladies and gents, I asked them to clean their bathroom yesterday. Those kiddos SCRUBBED that bathroom. They not only picked up their toys, clothes, and garbage, but they SCRUBBED it. Mirrors, counters, TOILET, tub, floors, you name it. I thought that they would put up a fight today when I mentioned cleaning their rooms. Nope. They also picked up the living room. I might just get used to this. I'm going to hang their calendars up in the main room of the house and put a picture of their prize above it. That way they will be able to mark their progress and remember why they are working so hard. I am SO proud of my kids. I know we are only on day 2, but they've made it farther than I thought they would. I just hope that if they keep this up Dan and I can come up with some good rewards in the future that are free, lol.
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
Earth Angels
I have always believed in God and angels. I am also a firm believer that God sends angels to help Him out down here on earth. Sometimes they are guardian angels that we can't see, and sometimes they are in the forms of friends and family members. I have had SEVERAL help me throughout this time. I've had them take kids, bring in meals, clean my house, and just sit and visit with me. When I had my little "Oh-my-gosh-I-could-be-having-this-baby-in-2-weeks-and-I-have-NOTHING" freak out session a few days ago, those angels kicked it into overdrive! I was having fun (probably a little too much fun) shopping online. Some things were so outrageously overpriced brand new that I almost had to take another little trip to the hospital. I then thought "I have several friends that have kids. Maybe they still have some of their baby stuff and would let me buy or borrow it..." I made a post on Facebook and BAM!! I have BOXES of baby girl clothes, toys, shoes, blankets, burp cloths, nursing pillows, and a Bumbo chair! I am pretty sure I'm not going to have to shop for clothes for this child for quite some time. This has helped us out SO much!! I am so grateful for the many, MANY angels out there who listened to the still, soft promptings from our Father in Heaven. I don't think anyone will truly understand how deep my gratitude and appreciation goes. I hope one day I will get the opportunity to "Pay It Forward." Thank you, my Angels here on Earth, for all you've done for my family and me!!
Countdown!
I had my weekly doctor's appointment today. These usually include getting weighed, getting my BP taken, listening to Annie's heartbeat, receiving a lecture on the importance of staying reclined and relaxed, and receiving my super-fan-freaking-tastic injection. Every once and a while he checks me for labor process or orders some blood work. This week he confirmed my last post: After today I only have ONE more injection, and after I hit 36 weeks I no longer have to take Procardia! He will not be stopping or slowing contractions down in a week and a half!!! The countdown IS ON!! Next week he has ordered a sonogram to make sure Annie is head-down and doing okay. I am SO excited. I have a feeling I'm going to have a baby the week of Valentine's Day. WAHOO!!!
Saturday, January 28, 2012
SHOPPING!!!
I have a love/hate relationship with shopping. I LOVE it because I like getting pretty new things and spending money. I hate it because I have to limit myself because I'm not made of money. When I go shopping, I typically go to the bank and take out my shopping budget with cash. That way I won't "accidentally" overspend. Let's face it, Ladies, you know what I'm talking about. You ALWAYS find that one article of clothing that you just HAVE to get that will take you over your predetermined budget. I have to either have Dan come along (which we both absolutely LOVE, btw *rolls eyes*) or make it physically impossible for me to overspend by leaving my debit/credit cards at home and taking cash. In my current situation, Dan's and my pocketbooks and bank accounts have gotten a little relief. Dan was in charge of Christmas, and he did a REALLY good job hunting for good deals. I'm lazy. I see what I want and I get it where I saw it first. Dan sees something, goes home, gets online, finds the best deal, and then finds a store closest to his route to work, kid's schools, church, etc, so he doesn't have to waste any gas. I'm not saying I don't bargain shop. I do look for deals, but I'm not "pro" like my husband. If he had it his way, we'd get darn near everything from a thrift store or garage sale. (Not dogging on thrift stores or garage sales, here. I LOVE them. I just prefer to get some things brand new.)
Anywho, I have made several lists over the last 7 weeks about things we will need for Annie. It has been 4 1/2 years since we've had an infant in our household, and all we have left is the "Golden Swing". (*I will add that story later). No baby clothes, bouncy chairs, Bumbo seats, car seats, infant strollers, etc...NOTHING but the pack n' play and Golden Swing. Dan kept telling me to go ahead and look things up online and start ordering them if I wanted. Here are the 3 reasons I've ignored him: 1. You can't REALLY tell how something looks online. It may look cute in the picture, but hideous in person. Just like you can't tell how something fits based on how it looks on the mannequin. You have to touch, feel, try on, and such before making the decision to buy it. In this case, I want to try folding the stroller, make sure the bouncy chair won't launch the baby across the room, and make sure the clothes are cute and comfortable enough for my baby. 2. I can't use cash to pay. Therefore, I will get tempted to go over the amount Dan and I have set because the money isn't in my hands for me to count or run out of. I hate debit/credit cards and the convenience they give us!! 3. "Meh, I have time..." Or so I thought. I got my nice little email reminder that I am 34 weeks! Whoo-hoo! 6 more "official" weeks, and only 2 more before the doctor takes me off my meds. Wait. What?? TWO WEEKS UNTIL I'M NO LONGER HAVING MY LABOR STOPPED BY MEDICATION?? There is a VERY real chance that I will have a baby in 2 weeks. I don't have a car seat. I have no clothes for the child. No diapers. No nursing tops. No pacifiers. NOTHING BUT THE GOLDEN SWING. Another realization hit me: Shipping can take 5-10 BUSINESS days. Yikes. My brain has been repeating this: "If I don't get cracking now, I may very well have to leave it up to my husband to pick out some random car seat on the way to pick us up from the hospital..." I love the man, but I cringe when I think of what he might pick out or where he'd buy it. With him it could one of two things: an overpriced car seat that happened to have Ninja-Turtles, Transformers, or Legend of Zelda characters on it, or something he saw at a garage sale. Either way, he'd be proud of his "excellent find" and I'd be mortified. So, I have started my online shopping. So far I've only gotten the car seat and stroller ordered, but I am pretty darn sure this might become an addiction. It is so blasted EASY. And I can always return it if I don't like it. I may need to just start making Wish Lists and have Dan look over them before I hit the "Submit Order" button. Maybe. Maybe not.
*The story of the Golden Swing*
Once upon a time there was a lovely young princess and a charming prince. They got married and had a beautiful baby boy. When they were finally able to bring the baby prince home from the hospital, they thought parenting was easy. And it was, for the baby prince slept through the night, only cried when he was hungry, and was easily entertained by his toys and regular baby swing. After some time had passed, a beautiful baby princess joined the royal family. She was NOTHING like the baby prince. Somehow, somewhere, a curse had been placed on the infant. She cried, and cried, and CRIED for hours and NOTHING could console her. When the Charming Prince would come home from his quests he could hardly recognize his once lovely wife, for she looked like a frazzled hag due to a severe lack of sleep. The exhausted royal parents sought help from the entire kingdom for a remedy to their daughter's ailment and sleep deprivation. The court physicians found nothing wrong with the child. The royal grandparents' soothing songs were drowned out by the child's screams. Magic Gripe Water and Mylicon drops may as well have been water for all the good they did. One particular night when the Charming Prince got home, he found his wife (still in her pajamas and looking worse than ever) and baby princess on the floor crying their eyes out, and his son running around naked screaming his at the top of his lungs. He picked up the baby princess, put her in her car seat, and started swinging it from side to side instead of front to back. The baby princess's cries ceased!! Pretty soon the entire castle was quiet because all of its inhabitants were stunned speechless. It was late and passed the royal curfew, but the Charming Prince had heard tale of a magical Golden Swing that would swing from side to side instead of front to back. It was in a far off land and the price was extremely high, but he HAD to try and find it at once so he could break the spells which afflicted his wife and daughter. He set out immediately and did not return until he had fought the traffic and cranky Christmas drivers to get his prize. His wife asked him where he had gotten the money for the Golden Swing and he just smiled and told her not to worry about buying him any Christmas presents that year. His Christmas gift was seeing the baby princess sleeping soundly in her Golden Swing and his wife sleeping peacefully in his arms. The End.
Anywho, I have made several lists over the last 7 weeks about things we will need for Annie. It has been 4 1/2 years since we've had an infant in our household, and all we have left is the "Golden Swing". (*I will add that story later). No baby clothes, bouncy chairs, Bumbo seats, car seats, infant strollers, etc...NOTHING but the pack n' play and Golden Swing. Dan kept telling me to go ahead and look things up online and start ordering them if I wanted. Here are the 3 reasons I've ignored him: 1. You can't REALLY tell how something looks online. It may look cute in the picture, but hideous in person. Just like you can't tell how something fits based on how it looks on the mannequin. You have to touch, feel, try on, and such before making the decision to buy it. In this case, I want to try folding the stroller, make sure the bouncy chair won't launch the baby across the room, and make sure the clothes are cute and comfortable enough for my baby. 2. I can't use cash to pay. Therefore, I will get tempted to go over the amount Dan and I have set because the money isn't in my hands for me to count or run out of. I hate debit/credit cards and the convenience they give us!! 3. "Meh, I have time..." Or so I thought. I got my nice little email reminder that I am 34 weeks! Whoo-hoo! 6 more "official" weeks, and only 2 more before the doctor takes me off my meds. Wait. What?? TWO WEEKS UNTIL I'M NO LONGER HAVING MY LABOR STOPPED BY MEDICATION?? There is a VERY real chance that I will have a baby in 2 weeks. I don't have a car seat. I have no clothes for the child. No diapers. No nursing tops. No pacifiers. NOTHING BUT THE GOLDEN SWING. Another realization hit me: Shipping can take 5-10 BUSINESS days. Yikes. My brain has been repeating this: "If I don't get cracking now, I may very well have to leave it up to my husband to pick out some random car seat on the way to pick us up from the hospital..." I love the man, but I cringe when I think of what he might pick out or where he'd buy it. With him it could one of two things: an overpriced car seat that happened to have Ninja-Turtles, Transformers, or Legend of Zelda characters on it, or something he saw at a garage sale. Either way, he'd be proud of his "excellent find" and I'd be mortified. So, I have started my online shopping. So far I've only gotten the car seat and stroller ordered, but I am pretty darn sure this might become an addiction. It is so blasted EASY. And I can always return it if I don't like it. I may need to just start making Wish Lists and have Dan look over them before I hit the "Submit Order" button. Maybe. Maybe not.
*The story of the Golden Swing*
Once upon a time there was a lovely young princess and a charming prince. They got married and had a beautiful baby boy. When they were finally able to bring the baby prince home from the hospital, they thought parenting was easy. And it was, for the baby prince slept through the night, only cried when he was hungry, and was easily entertained by his toys and regular baby swing. After some time had passed, a beautiful baby princess joined the royal family. She was NOTHING like the baby prince. Somehow, somewhere, a curse had been placed on the infant. She cried, and cried, and CRIED for hours and NOTHING could console her. When the Charming Prince would come home from his quests he could hardly recognize his once lovely wife, for she looked like a frazzled hag due to a severe lack of sleep. The exhausted royal parents sought help from the entire kingdom for a remedy to their daughter's ailment and sleep deprivation. The court physicians found nothing wrong with the child. The royal grandparents' soothing songs were drowned out by the child's screams. Magic Gripe Water and Mylicon drops may as well have been water for all the good they did. One particular night when the Charming Prince got home, he found his wife (still in her pajamas and looking worse than ever) and baby princess on the floor crying their eyes out, and his son running around naked screaming his at the top of his lungs. He picked up the baby princess, put her in her car seat, and started swinging it from side to side instead of front to back. The baby princess's cries ceased!! Pretty soon the entire castle was quiet because all of its inhabitants were stunned speechless. It was late and passed the royal curfew, but the Charming Prince had heard tale of a magical Golden Swing that would swing from side to side instead of front to back. It was in a far off land and the price was extremely high, but he HAD to try and find it at once so he could break the spells which afflicted his wife and daughter. He set out immediately and did not return until he had fought the traffic and cranky Christmas drivers to get his prize. His wife asked him where he had gotten the money for the Golden Swing and he just smiled and told her not to worry about buying him any Christmas presents that year. His Christmas gift was seeing the baby princess sleeping soundly in her Golden Swing and his wife sleeping peacefully in his arms. The End.
Friday, January 27, 2012
Our Newest Non-Human Family Member
The last 2 months have been an emotional roller coaster for my entire family. Prior to being put on bed rest, we had a Siamese cat named Percy. Well..."Prince Perseus Dastan *Our Long Last Name*" was his official title. (Give me a break, I have a 4 and 5 year old.) This cat was the sweetest, prettiest, most patient cat I have ever known. He was almost like a dog in some ways. He LOVED to play, would wait by the door for me to come home from work, and he was the best snuggle buddy to everyone. The poor thing never scratched or hissed at the kids, which, IMO, earned him automatic Saint-hood in Feline Heaven. He had his tail pulled, was thrown into a full bathtub, and was oh, so loved by my children. He was the perfect cat...EXCEPT for the fact that he started spraying around the house. We tried everything we could to get him to stop (vets, changing his diet, blocking off his favorite areas, and he was already neutered when we got him, so...) and Dan and I were starting to get sick of cleaning up after the darn thing. Jayden overheard us talking about possibly needing to get rid of the cat if he didn't stop. He started taking care of Percy without being asked. (Feeding, watering, cleaning out the litter box...) He didn't want to lose him. To tell you the truth, Dan and I didn't want to lose him, either. EVERYONE LOVED that darn cat. Well, long story short, when I spent almost a week in the hospital we decided that we couldn't have Percy messing all over the house if we were going to be bringing a pre-mature baby into this world. We had to focus on what was best for me and the rest of the family. We couldn't keep dragging the carpet cleaner out 4 or 5 times a day anymore. It was a very emotional time for all of us. Jayden, Karah, Dan, and I all shed tears as we said our good-byes to Percy, and poor Dan (who won't admit it, but that cat was HIS cat) had to make the drive to the animal shelter. He and Jayden took it the hardest, and Jay has really missed being responsible for something. He kept asking us for another cat "that won't pee all over the place" for his birthday, and we couldn't make that kind of guarantee. Finally Dan told him that until our family is in a better situation, the only pet we could possibly have would be a fish. So, his birthday list changed from a cat to a fish.
Jayden's birthday was on Sunday. I know. I get the "Worst Mother of the Year Award" for blogging my little pity party instead of the reflecting on the 6th anniversary of the day I became a mother for the first time. I will now play my "Hormonally-Unstable-Crazy-Pregnant-Woman" card. I am blogging about it now that I have had a chance to recuperate. He got a pretty sweet haul for his birthday. He got his very own Karate sparring equipment and 2 Star Wars action figures from Dan and I, a super-cool Texas Longhorns (HOOK 'EM!!) gym bag and 10 $1 bills hidden throughout it from my parents (which, BTW, he LOVED that treasure hunt. He kept pointing out to Dan and I that he was now richer than us with every dollar that he found...), an awesome dinosaur Hot-Wheels set up from my sister and her family, and *drum-roll* "Fishie-Gold Qui-Gon Gin *Our Long Last Name* the Warrior Fighting Fish" and all the special things needed to take care of him from my grandparents. Try saying that poor fish's name 3 times fast, I dare you. Shoot, try it once without messing it up. For blog-space purposes, I am simply going to refer to him as "The Fish". He is a beautiful blue Beta (Where "Fishie-Gold" came from, I know not...) and fairly active for one, too. He is also PERFECT for Jay. I know he can't snuggle or play with The Fish like he could with Percy, but he is so excited to have something to take care of again. The Fish is very low maintenance (Hallelujah) and Jay has had so much fun getting his tank ready, feeding him, and just watching as he swims around. We couldn't have asked for a better birthday for him!
I am constantly amazed by my son. He is only 6 years old, but he acts so much older. I don't know of many kids his age that prefer to watch the Animal Planet or History Channel over Batman and Transformers. Or, will choose helping his little sister clean her room over playing video games. He LOVES to learn and will drop whatever he's doing if Dan or I say "Hey, Jayden, want to see something cool I learned today?" When Dan was in school, one of Jay's favorite things to do was "study" with him. He would look over Dan's Anatomy and Physiology books with him and he STILL spouts off random facts about the human body 2 years later. He would get mad when his teacher wouldn't send home any homework. (?!?!?) He actually asked her to give him homework on "No Homework" days!! She will now put one or two practice sheets in his folder for him on those days. She is constantly telling me how he amazes her with the way he thinks. All I can say to that is, "Me too!" I LOVE my little boy, and I am so glad that God blessed me with such a sweet, amazing, and gifted child. He is so responsible for a child his age, and I am so proud to be the one he calls "Mommy"!
Jayden's birthday was on Sunday. I know. I get the "Worst Mother of the Year Award" for blogging my little pity party instead of the reflecting on the 6th anniversary of the day I became a mother for the first time. I will now play my "Hormonally-Unstable-Crazy-Pregnant-Woman" card. I am blogging about it now that I have had a chance to recuperate. He got a pretty sweet haul for his birthday. He got his very own Karate sparring equipment and 2 Star Wars action figures from Dan and I, a super-cool Texas Longhorns (HOOK 'EM!!) gym bag and 10 $1 bills hidden throughout it from my parents (which, BTW, he LOVED that treasure hunt. He kept pointing out to Dan and I that he was now richer than us with every dollar that he found...), an awesome dinosaur Hot-Wheels set up from my sister and her family, and *drum-roll* "Fishie-Gold Qui-Gon Gin *Our Long Last Name* the Warrior Fighting Fish" and all the special things needed to take care of him from my grandparents. Try saying that poor fish's name 3 times fast, I dare you. Shoot, try it once without messing it up. For blog-space purposes, I am simply going to refer to him as "The Fish". He is a beautiful blue Beta (Where "Fishie-Gold" came from, I know not...) and fairly active for one, too. He is also PERFECT for Jay. I know he can't snuggle or play with The Fish like he could with Percy, but he is so excited to have something to take care of again. The Fish is very low maintenance (Hallelujah) and Jay has had so much fun getting his tank ready, feeding him, and just watching as he swims around. We couldn't have asked for a better birthday for him!
I am constantly amazed by my son. He is only 6 years old, but he acts so much older. I don't know of many kids his age that prefer to watch the Animal Planet or History Channel over Batman and Transformers. Or, will choose helping his little sister clean her room over playing video games. He LOVES to learn and will drop whatever he's doing if Dan or I say "Hey, Jayden, want to see something cool I learned today?" When Dan was in school, one of Jay's favorite things to do was "study" with him. He would look over Dan's Anatomy and Physiology books with him and he STILL spouts off random facts about the human body 2 years later. He would get mad when his teacher wouldn't send home any homework. (?!?!?) He actually asked her to give him homework on "No Homework" days!! She will now put one or two practice sheets in his folder for him on those days. She is constantly telling me how he amazes her with the way he thinks. All I can say to that is, "Me too!" I LOVE my little boy, and I am so glad that God blessed me with such a sweet, amazing, and gifted child. He is so responsible for a child his age, and I am so proud to be the one he calls "Mommy"!
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Sunday, January 22, 2012
TRUTH
I typically try not to post my whine fests. This is probably because I know some of my friends and family follow this blog and I don't want to come across as a complete idiot/wimp/failure. But THIS SUCKS. There are times where I can see the blessings around me and I'm grateful for those experiences, but there are times when I honestly kind of wish I could be DONE. "She may be premature, but most babies born this early are typically fine, so let's do it!" I will admit those thoughts have become more and more frequent with every @!$# contraction I have. It isn't fun being stuck on the couch all day, every day, not being able to help my dear, sweet, poor husband in any way, shape, or form. The poor man has it 3 on 1 right now. It was a full time job keeping the house clean when it was 2 vs 2, and right now he is being sorely defeated by laundry, Barbies, Legos, and random assorted crap that I swear little evil goblins create and leave around when we aren't looking. I mean, today I stepped on a little storage box that has been under my bed for over a year. NO ONE KNOWS WHERE IT CAME FROM. Little goblins from Hades, you aren't helping anything!!
I am finding it harder and harder to stay down like I am supposed to. My kids need me, my husband needs me, and I am ready to have my life back. I know that Annie needs me right now, too, and I try to keep that in mind as I suffer through this. She needs to "cook" as long as possible, and I feel horrible for hoping that she does come a little early. It is just that idea of going through this for SEVEN MORE WEEKS almost makes me want to drink Castor Oil, jump on a trampoline, go bowling, and pretty much every other Old Wives' Tales out there for inducing labor. Not that I'd really need to do any of that...I have been having contractions since mid December. Not the Braxton Hicks painless practice contractions. The real-deal-I-want-to-punch-every-male-human-being-in-the-stomach kind. I've just been having them slowed down by medication and laying down, thanks to my doctor.
What is funny is that my doctor is male. And I typically like him very much. He's nice, funny, and a BYU fan (he is also a U of U fan, but we don't talk about that). And he (usually) doesn't say dumb stuff like my doctor out in Idaho did. ("Oh, don't worry. Labor isn't as painful as some women would have you think." That coming from a man, who, last time I checked, didn't have the ability to push a human being out of his uterus. HOW COULD HE POSSIBLY KNOW?? He was 100% WRONG, by the way...he is just lucky that the flipping anesthesiologist hit the wrong nerve and rendered me temporarily paralyzed. Otherwise he probably would have gotten a black eye somewhere in the 21 painful hours it took to get Jayden here...) This last appointment, though, I kind of wanted to smack him and make snide remark about his U of U education. He had the nerve to say "Well, it is only 7 more weeks! You're getting close!" Now, I know he was trying to be optimistic and cheer me up, and I also know that he doesn't really expect me to make it all the way to 40 weeks, but I am to that point where I don't want to hear that crap. It isn't "only" seven weeks. It is seven weeks of bang-my-head-against-the-wall-torture. I have just barely made it through six weeks. I honestly think that it will be a flipping miracle if I make it through the next 3 weeks without having a severe mental/emotional breakdown.
I know that I have a really crappy attitude tonight. I'm tired, hormonal, uncomfortable, and my toes look like Vienna sausages. And I can't reach them anymore to paint them. Totally random last complaints, I know, but this is my pity party. I just needed to get these thoughts out of my head. Going back and reading them helps me to see where I need to focus my energy. I need to get more sleep (as I sit here typing this at 1:30 in the morning...), find peaceful non-mess-making activities to do with my kids (such as reading stories together and playing some small games), accept help when it is offered (no matter how embarrassed I am with people seeing my dirty laundry), and increase my scripture reading, prayers, and "journal writing" (aka posting to my blog). I've been neglecting to do a lot of those things this last week, and I truly feel that is where all of my negativity has come from. I hope that I can follow through with these goals this week and get back to being happy about my situation. I also hope that some way, some how, Dan's burden can be lifted so we can enjoy this time and prepare for Annie's arrival.
I am finding it harder and harder to stay down like I am supposed to. My kids need me, my husband needs me, and I am ready to have my life back. I know that Annie needs me right now, too, and I try to keep that in mind as I suffer through this. She needs to "cook" as long as possible, and I feel horrible for hoping that she does come a little early. It is just that idea of going through this for SEVEN MORE WEEKS almost makes me want to drink Castor Oil, jump on a trampoline, go bowling, and pretty much every other Old Wives' Tales out there for inducing labor. Not that I'd really need to do any of that...I have been having contractions since mid December. Not the Braxton Hicks painless practice contractions. The real-deal-I-want-to-punch-every-male-human-being-in-the-stomach kind. I've just been having them slowed down by medication and laying down, thanks to my doctor.
What is funny is that my doctor is male. And I typically like him very much. He's nice, funny, and a BYU fan (he is also a U of U fan, but we don't talk about that). And he (usually) doesn't say dumb stuff like my doctor out in Idaho did. ("Oh, don't worry. Labor isn't as painful as some women would have you think." That coming from a man, who, last time I checked, didn't have the ability to push a human being out of his uterus. HOW COULD HE POSSIBLY KNOW?? He was 100% WRONG, by the way...he is just lucky that the flipping anesthesiologist hit the wrong nerve and rendered me temporarily paralyzed. Otherwise he probably would have gotten a black eye somewhere in the 21 painful hours it took to get Jayden here...) This last appointment, though, I kind of wanted to smack him and make snide remark about his U of U education. He had the nerve to say "Well, it is only 7 more weeks! You're getting close!" Now, I know he was trying to be optimistic and cheer me up, and I also know that he doesn't really expect me to make it all the way to 40 weeks, but I am to that point where I don't want to hear that crap. It isn't "only" seven weeks. It is seven weeks of bang-my-head-against-the-wall-torture. I have just barely made it through six weeks. I honestly think that it will be a flipping miracle if I make it through the next 3 weeks without having a severe mental/emotional breakdown.
I know that I have a really crappy attitude tonight. I'm tired, hormonal, uncomfortable, and my toes look like Vienna sausages. And I can't reach them anymore to paint them. Totally random last complaints, I know, but this is my pity party. I just needed to get these thoughts out of my head. Going back and reading them helps me to see where I need to focus my energy. I need to get more sleep (as I sit here typing this at 1:30 in the morning...), find peaceful non-mess-making activities to do with my kids (such as reading stories together and playing some small games), accept help when it is offered (no matter how embarrassed I am with people seeing my dirty laundry), and increase my scripture reading, prayers, and "journal writing" (aka posting to my blog). I've been neglecting to do a lot of those things this last week, and I truly feel that is where all of my negativity has come from. I hope that I can follow through with these goals this week and get back to being happy about my situation. I also hope that some way, some how, Dan's burden can be lifted so we can enjoy this time and prepare for Annie's arrival.
Monday, January 9, 2012
Talking to Annie
So, this weekend I got to spend a night in the hospital again. I'm taking medicine every day that is supposed to stop contractions, getting a shot in the hiney once a week to prevent contractions, and laying down all day to flipping prevent pre-term labor and my body decided to give all of that stuff the finger. Thankfully, my contractions slowed down a few hours after they gave me a shot of terbuteline and I didn't have to stay a week like last time. I got back Sunday morning and briefly saw the kids before they went to church. We hung out with my parents and sister's family after church (I was down the entire time) and so I didn't really get to see my kids very much because they were running around with cousins. This morning made up for it.
I am not a morning person. I never have been. I would be perfectly happy sleeping in till noon every day. In fact, right now, technically I'm allowed to. But my 4 year old daughter didn't get that memo. She is up at 6:30 am (or before) every morning, no alarm clock necessary. It doesn't matter what time she goes to bed, either. Normally our morning routine consists of Dan turning on a show for Karah before he leaves to drop Jayden off at school and head to work so I can take my time waking up and not bite anyone's head off. He forgot to do that this morning, though, for some reason, and I am glad. We had a thunderstorm last night (and if you know me, you know I have an enormous phobia of thunderstorms) so I was already awake when Karah woke up. She hung out with Dan and Jay and "helped" them get ready. When they left, she came in to hang out with me. I normally don't like interacting with people if I haven't gotten a good night's sleep. Because I'm cranky. But Karah changed all of that for me this morning. She was SO SWEET! She laid there and snuggled me quietly for a little while. Then she told me to roll over so she could "hold me". I did, and she rubbed my back and hugged me from behind. While she was hugging me, Annie kicked her hand. Karah got so excited! We've tried to get her to feel Annie kick several times, but Annie has been shy about kicking when someone is trying to feel it. I suggested that Karah talk to Annie. This is how the some of the "conversation" went:
Karah: "Hi, Annie. How 'ya doin' in there? Um...(what else should I say, Mommy?)"
Me: "Tell her about the world."
Karah: "Well, there's lots of stuff in the world, Annie. And Jesus and Heavenly Father made the world. There's houses, and cars, and tvs so we can watch shows. We can ride bikes, and play at the park, and run around outside. There's lots of different foods and pancakes on a stick that are SOOOO yummy. There's games, and clouds, and lots of animals. You will need to listen. Listening is really good. If you don't listen, you will get in TROUBLE. So always listen and obey. Because TROUBLE is NOT fun. We need to be good. Like Jesus. He was so good. And He loves us. He can do anything we need. Because He is a grown up who died and came back to life again and NEVER DIED AGAIN. He is God's Son. And He loves all of us. Like I love you, and Mommy loves me."
Goodness! Tears were streaming down my cheeks as I listened to my daughter talking to her soon-to-be baby sister. It is moments like these that makes pregnancy and labor worth it. I sat there and listened to Karah tell Annie all about the world for about 10 more minutes. Karah then wanted to tell me a story and snuggle me some more. I cannot believe I have allowed myself to miss out on these morning moments with her just so I could lay there and be ticked off that I was no longer sleeping. I think Karah and I will have a different routine in the mornings from now on.
I am not a morning person. I never have been. I would be perfectly happy sleeping in till noon every day. In fact, right now, technically I'm allowed to. But my 4 year old daughter didn't get that memo. She is up at 6:30 am (or before) every morning, no alarm clock necessary. It doesn't matter what time she goes to bed, either. Normally our morning routine consists of Dan turning on a show for Karah before he leaves to drop Jayden off at school and head to work so I can take my time waking up and not bite anyone's head off. He forgot to do that this morning, though, for some reason, and I am glad. We had a thunderstorm last night (and if you know me, you know I have an enormous phobia of thunderstorms) so I was already awake when Karah woke up. She hung out with Dan and Jay and "helped" them get ready. When they left, she came in to hang out with me. I normally don't like interacting with people if I haven't gotten a good night's sleep. Because I'm cranky. But Karah changed all of that for me this morning. She was SO SWEET! She laid there and snuggled me quietly for a little while. Then she told me to roll over so she could "hold me". I did, and she rubbed my back and hugged me from behind. While she was hugging me, Annie kicked her hand. Karah got so excited! We've tried to get her to feel Annie kick several times, but Annie has been shy about kicking when someone is trying to feel it. I suggested that Karah talk to Annie. This is how the some of the "conversation" went:
Karah: "Hi, Annie. How 'ya doin' in there? Um...(what else should I say, Mommy?)"
Me: "Tell her about the world."
Karah: "Well, there's lots of stuff in the world, Annie. And Jesus and Heavenly Father made the world. There's houses, and cars, and tvs so we can watch shows. We can ride bikes, and play at the park, and run around outside. There's lots of different foods and pancakes on a stick that are SOOOO yummy. There's games, and clouds, and lots of animals. You will need to listen. Listening is really good. If you don't listen, you will get in TROUBLE. So always listen and obey. Because TROUBLE is NOT fun. We need to be good. Like Jesus. He was so good. And He loves us. He can do anything we need. Because He is a grown up who died and came back to life again and NEVER DIED AGAIN. He is God's Son. And He loves all of us. Like I love you, and Mommy loves me."
Goodness! Tears were streaming down my cheeks as I listened to my daughter talking to her soon-to-be baby sister. It is moments like these that makes pregnancy and labor worth it. I sat there and listened to Karah tell Annie all about the world for about 10 more minutes. Karah then wanted to tell me a story and snuggle me some more. I cannot believe I have allowed myself to miss out on these morning moments with her just so I could lay there and be ticked off that I was no longer sleeping. I think Karah and I will have a different routine in the mornings from now on.
Sunday, January 8, 2012
A Long Long Time Ago, in a Galaxy Far Away....
*Cue Star Wars Theme Song!* If my last post didn't convince you of my level 110+ of nerdiness, I assure you, this one will. A few months ago, before all of the baby-drama started, we went out to Utah to visit Dan's family for Thanksgiving. My husband is the oldest of 10 (TEN) children. Yes, one-zero, 10, you read that right. There are 8 boys total, and 2 girls. 6 of the kids are married (and all but one are currently expecting or very,VERY recently gave birth). The 4 still at home range from 8-18, and they are all boys. So, naturally, Jayden loved every minute out there because he had lots and lots of boy things to do from Legos, gaming systems, Nerf Guns Wars, wrestling matches, and anything else "boy" related you can think of. In fact, 100% of what Santa brought him was decided during that trip. It was out there that he also discovered the game Lego Star Wars. He LOVED that game, and thanks to a very awesome aunt, he got it for Christmas! That game has helped tremendously in keeping his room clean and his happy attitude. Especially since he has to "buy time" with points earned from doing chores around the house. Anyway, he loves the game. But, he had never seen the movies. Dan and I are pretty old-school in the fact that we pay attention to the ratings of movies and their content before letting our children watch them. If it is PG, they don't see it until we've previewed it. And if we think it is inappropriate, then they can't watch it. We've had many, many emotional breakdowns over this rule. It is a rule that Dan's and my parents both had, and though we hated it as kids, I am grateful they cared enough to make sure we could handle certain things before letting us watch them.
Anyway, I got off track there for a minute. Jayden hadn't seen the movies, yet, so he really didn't know what was going on in the game. He just liked to play it. He would get so excited about beating a level and he would come in to tell me about it. "And the old guy with the green sword fought the black robot, and..." AND I CRINGED. I loved that my little boy was so excited about Star Wars and beating the game, but it was like fingernails on the chalkboard to hear MY CHILD refer to Obi-Wan Ken-obi as an "old guy", a Light Saber as a "sword", and DARTH VADER as a "BLACK ROBOT"!!!! I called Dan at work and asked him if he thought our kids were old enough to finally be exposed to the awesomeness that is the original Star Wars Trilogy. He was surprised they hadn't already been. We talked about it a little more because, honestly, there are some pretty intense things for a 4 and 5 year old to witness. Burned bodies, arms getting cut off, twisted family dynamics, and so on. But we also discussed the epic battle between good and evil, the importance of friendship, and a few other good qualities the movies possessed. In the end, the movies won out. We decided that we were going to watch them as a family (so we could stop, edit, or explain anything where needed), and only watch a little bit each night throughout the week due to Karate, late work days for Dan, school, and such. This week has been one of the Best. Weeks. EVER. We told the kids on Sunday that we would start watching the Star Wars movies that night if they behaved and got their rooms clean. Karah was a little disinterested, but she went along with it because Jayden seemed so psyched up about it. We all got snuggled up on the couch after dinner and began with A New Hope. Oh. My. Goodness. I can't begin to express how awesome this experience was. Jayden had so many questions (good ones, not annoying ones) and Karah (who typically loses interest pretty quick in movies if they don't include singing animals or fairy princesses...THANK YOU GEORGE LUCAS FOR PRINCESS LEIA!!) really got into it. Every once and a while Jay would bring something up like "Man, if Darth Vader would just stop trying to be bossy and listen to others, he would probably not be so mad! And then people wouldn't have to fight!" *I LOVE HIM* The kids enjoyed A New Hope, and they LOVED The Empire Strikes back, up until the last 10 minutes, that is. I WISH I had my camera out for their reactions to Darth Vader's "I am your father!" reveal. I wholeheartedly believe both my children were far more devastated than Luke himself. Real tears were shed. "But Vader's a BAD GUY!!! He CAN'T be Luke's DAD!! DID YOU NOT SEE HIM CUT OFF HIS HAND??? DADS DON'T CUT OFF THEIR SON'S HANDS!!"
The next morning Jayden came into my room while I was getting ready (meaning, while I was thinking about whether to stay in bed or mosey on out to the couch). "I can't wait to watch Star Wars tonight and see Darth Vader turn good!" Now, Dan and I have said NOTHING to our kids regarding the upcoming plot of Return of the Jedi, mainly because we wanted to witness their genuine reactions. "What makes you think he is going to turn good, Jay?" "Well, DUH, Mom. He's Luke's DAD. And dads aren't BAD." Karah piped in and said, "It only makes sense" and added a little nod, as if that settled it, signaling the end of the conversation. We decided that since it was Friday night, we would just start the movie and watch it straight through. Our copy was recorded off of the DVR, and we didn't realize that the last 5 minutes or so had been cut off. We watched the movie, both kids cried when the little Ewok mourns his little friend, both yelled angrily at the Emperor when they realized it was all a trap, and Jayden even cried out "WHY DID YOU LET US WATCH THIS MOVIE IF THEY ARE ALL JUST GONNA DIE???" when the Emperor started shocking Luke. Both jumped off the couch and cheered when Vader saved Luke and started doing a victory dance ("See, Mom?? We told you he was going to turn good!!") Then, they started crying again when Anakin died. The movie cut off just as they set fire to Darth Vader (which mortified Karah until we explained they were just burning his suit to show he had died "Good Guy Anakin" instead of "Bad Guy Darth Vader"...). Jayden was so tired after the movie ended that he had a little emotional breakdown about the Ewoks when Dan and I realized that he thought ALL of the Ewoks had died. I went to YouTube and found the last 10 minutes of the movie and showed the parties, celebration, and the Ewok village (all happy and alive) and that calmed him down enough to get him to sleep.
I love that my kids love Star Wars. It gives me something else to talk to them about that I am interested as well. AND, Jayden is now just as picky as me when it comes to Star Wars terminology. (I will have you know that I never tried to correct him before, because I knew he didn't know any better.) I also have another bargaining chip, seeing as the kids can't wait to watch the movies again...
Anyway, I got off track there for a minute. Jayden hadn't seen the movies, yet, so he really didn't know what was going on in the game. He just liked to play it. He would get so excited about beating a level and he would come in to tell me about it. "And the old guy with the green sword fought the black robot, and..." AND I CRINGED. I loved that my little boy was so excited about Star Wars and beating the game, but it was like fingernails on the chalkboard to hear MY CHILD refer to Obi-Wan Ken-obi as an "old guy", a Light Saber as a "sword", and DARTH VADER as a "BLACK ROBOT"!!!! I called Dan at work and asked him if he thought our kids were old enough to finally be exposed to the awesomeness that is the original Star Wars Trilogy. He was surprised they hadn't already been. We talked about it a little more because, honestly, there are some pretty intense things for a 4 and 5 year old to witness. Burned bodies, arms getting cut off, twisted family dynamics, and so on. But we also discussed the epic battle between good and evil, the importance of friendship, and a few other good qualities the movies possessed. In the end, the movies won out. We decided that we were going to watch them as a family (so we could stop, edit, or explain anything where needed), and only watch a little bit each night throughout the week due to Karate, late work days for Dan, school, and such. This week has been one of the Best. Weeks. EVER. We told the kids on Sunday that we would start watching the Star Wars movies that night if they behaved and got their rooms clean. Karah was a little disinterested, but she went along with it because Jayden seemed so psyched up about it. We all got snuggled up on the couch after dinner and began with A New Hope. Oh. My. Goodness. I can't begin to express how awesome this experience was. Jayden had so many questions (good ones, not annoying ones) and Karah (who typically loses interest pretty quick in movies if they don't include singing animals or fairy princesses...THANK YOU GEORGE LUCAS FOR PRINCESS LEIA!!) really got into it. Every once and a while Jay would bring something up like "Man, if Darth Vader would just stop trying to be bossy and listen to others, he would probably not be so mad! And then people wouldn't have to fight!" *I LOVE HIM* The kids enjoyed A New Hope, and they LOVED The Empire Strikes back, up until the last 10 minutes, that is. I WISH I had my camera out for their reactions to Darth Vader's "I am your father!" reveal. I wholeheartedly believe both my children were far more devastated than Luke himself. Real tears were shed. "But Vader's a BAD GUY!!! He CAN'T be Luke's DAD!! DID YOU NOT SEE HIM CUT OFF HIS HAND??? DADS DON'T CUT OFF THEIR SON'S HANDS!!"
The next morning Jayden came into my room while I was getting ready (meaning, while I was thinking about whether to stay in bed or mosey on out to the couch). "I can't wait to watch Star Wars tonight and see Darth Vader turn good!" Now, Dan and I have said NOTHING to our kids regarding the upcoming plot of Return of the Jedi, mainly because we wanted to witness their genuine reactions. "What makes you think he is going to turn good, Jay?" "Well, DUH, Mom. He's Luke's DAD. And dads aren't BAD." Karah piped in and said, "It only makes sense" and added a little nod, as if that settled it, signaling the end of the conversation. We decided that since it was Friday night, we would just start the movie and watch it straight through. Our copy was recorded off of the DVR, and we didn't realize that the last 5 minutes or so had been cut off. We watched the movie, both kids cried when the little Ewok mourns his little friend, both yelled angrily at the Emperor when they realized it was all a trap, and Jayden even cried out "WHY DID YOU LET US WATCH THIS MOVIE IF THEY ARE ALL JUST GONNA DIE???" when the Emperor started shocking Luke. Both jumped off the couch and cheered when Vader saved Luke and started doing a victory dance ("See, Mom?? We told you he was going to turn good!!") Then, they started crying again when Anakin died. The movie cut off just as they set fire to Darth Vader (which mortified Karah until we explained they were just burning his suit to show he had died "Good Guy Anakin" instead of "Bad Guy Darth Vader"...). Jayden was so tired after the movie ended that he had a little emotional breakdown about the Ewoks when Dan and I realized that he thought ALL of the Ewoks had died. I went to YouTube and found the last 10 minutes of the movie and showed the parties, celebration, and the Ewok village (all happy and alive) and that calmed him down enough to get him to sleep.
I love that my kids love Star Wars. It gives me something else to talk to them about that I am interested as well. AND, Jayden is now just as picky as me when it comes to Star Wars terminology. (I will have you know that I never tried to correct him before, because I knew he didn't know any better.) I also have another bargaining chip, seeing as the kids can't wait to watch the movies again...
Monday, January 2, 2012
BOOKS!!!
Being on bed-rest has its ups and downs. I have discovered a huge UP lately. "Santa" brought me a Nook reader for Christmas. Now, there is something you should know about my relationship with books...when I'm reading a book, NOTHING ELSE EXISTS. I won't eat, sleep, clean, or pay attention to anything until the book is finished. I used to read all the time. I was the kid who got in trouble in class for READING. Yeah, I'm not a nerd, or anything. Well, once I had kids, reading had to be put on the back burner. It turns out that if you don't pay attention to your toddlers, a never-been-opened Costco-sized tub of extra-chunky peanut butter can end up all over the flipping house and said children. I'm talking carpet, walls, upstairs, downstairs, in the diaper, in the hair, between the toes, up the nose, in the ears, and I was still discovering peanut butter in various places around the house weeks later...and that was after only reading 2 chapters... I learned my lesson after that. Instead of reading one or two books a week, I cut back to one or two books every 2 months or so. Life was just too hectic with two active tots running around. Once I started working full time I read even less. Since I've been on bed-rest I have read more than I have in the last 2 years combined. Along with my Nook, I received The Help from my sister and a surprise "survival kit" full of books from my aunt. Jayden is also to the point where he is starting to read. It has been nice to be able to have the time and sit down and work with him on that. He is only in kindergarten, but he is starting a series of chapter books called "Captain Underpants". It makes my heart swell with pride when he asks to read them with me. I am so grateful for this time. It can be nerve racking, boring, and all-out frustrating to have to LAY DOWN all day, every day, but I realize how much I've missed out on being a working mom instead of a stay at home mom. I am grateful to my Heavenly Father for letting me be home right now. Some of my best memories are of my mom reading the Harry Potter books to my brother and I. We were old enough to read them ourselves, but Mom made them come alive in a way that I can't describe. I hope I can help my kids develop a love for reading because now I have time for them to see how important it is to me. I have the time to work with Jay and let him see how his imagination can take him places that movies and video games can't. There have been many times I've looked at being on bed-rest as a punishment or curse, and I am ashamed of that. It truly is a blessing in disguise as I am able to develop a closer relationship with my children as we prepare for Annie's arrival. I only hope and pray we can continue to grow closer after she gets here.
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